Age: 22
Favorite movie: Star Wars RULEZZ!!! I quit cutting my fingernails a few years ago in hopes of achieving Yoda’s thickened claws. Now, I no longer need to use a knife when I eat.
Quote by which I live my life: Sleep is a good substitute for caffeine, though I have yet to try it out.
Major: Philosophy/pre-med. If that doesn’t pan out, I’m thinking of going to grad school in male grass-skirt weaving. The peek-a-boo, now-you-see-it-now-you-don’t type of fashion appeals to me.
Favorite hobbies: Traveling, walks and stargazing in Haiti. A walk is one of mankind’s greatest undiscovered joys.
Random facts: I was home-schooled from third to twelfth grade. I had to enroll in Proper Social Behavior II before they let me out of the basement. I am often mistaken for royalty or an escaped mental patient, and I like shiny objects. I’m perfect, although not arrogant at all.
Favorite building on campus: Ford Hall, before the philosophy department was unceremoniously kicked over to West Bank.
Reminder to self: Owe Ben and Jerry’s ice cream to Quang Trieu and Mike Stenerson.
Favorite body part: The webbing between my toes.
Future plans: Treating obscure tropical diseases in a thatched hut under the Southern Cross.
My column runs every other Monday.