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The Minnesota Daily

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By demonizing pleasure, we set ourselves up for unfulfilling sex lives.
Opinion: Let’s talk about sex
Published March 27, 2024

Dear Dr. Date, Aft…

Dear Dr. Date,
After reading your column from Monday regarding how “nice guys” can get hooked up with women that seem to be obsessed with dating jerks, I’ve got a few tips and ideas that I’d like to share with your readers.
The first thing that comes to mind is smile. Go beyond that, though; “kick it up a notch” by looking people in the face. Make eye contact! Don’t be afraid to hold your head up high on campus or off. You’ve got to have a positive outlook and self-confidence in all aspects of your life. When you present yourself in a positive and upbeat manner, people notice. Why would anyone want to get to know someone who is negative? Body language can speak volumes about a person. For instance, if you are riding on the Campus Connector, rather than staring blankly at the floor, look outside at the surroundings, or look at the other people riding the bus. There are lots of good-looking folks who are surely in the same situation as you out there. Plus, you’ve already got something in common with bus-riders and other University folks: You’re at the University either seeking an education and/or making a living here. Start from there and see what happens!
— Anonymous AgMan

You have many choices about what attitude to strike when riding on the bus. The worst would be to assume that everyone on the bus hates you and thinks you are a big idiot. There could well be someone on the bus that thinks this, but most likely, no one is even paying attention to you. Tied closely to this attitude is scanning the bus crowd and critically and rather cruelly identifying each person’s faults. This attitude will only lead to the aforementioned paranoid attitude.
The only problem with the bus is that personal space boundaries are easily blurred and what can seem like an innocent conversation from your perspective can be terribly creepy from the perspective of the other person. Don’t sweat it. Do as the author of today’s letter suggests and put a smile on your face. Don’t fake it, either. Drop all those stupid ugly, negative thoughts from your head. They only give you the false sense that you are a better person. As long as you have no creepy intentions, you are not at fault for talking to someone.
Do something different today. Ask the person sitting next to you a question or make a comment about the scenery. Don’t expect this to turn into the most amazing, heartfelt exchange you’ve ever had, because it probably won’t be. But you could have a nice simple conversation with someone you’ve never met. Who knows what might come of it? Isn’t it about time you made some new friends?

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