Dear Dr. Date,A week ago a woman picked me up in a bar and we went to her place. In her apartment we talked for a while, then we started touching. After that, I performed oral sex on her; this is the first time I did it. I am still a virgin now. She got wet and my mouth touched the wet “liquid.” She tried to get me to have sex with her, but I was worried about AIDS and did not do it. My penis just touched her vagina’s lips and it also touched the juice, too. That was it.Dr. Date, I am really desperate now. I cannot concentrate on my study at all, because I am worried about getting this terrible disease. Let’s assume that she has AIDS, then what may happen to me or to my mouth especially. I should not have gone with her to her apartment; I should not have done it at all.DR. DATE, COULD YOU PLEASE TAKE A FEW MINUTES TO ANSWER MY LETTER? I AM WAITING FOR YOUR REPLY EVERY MINUTE. PLEASE, HELP ME!!! I WAS ABOUT TO DO SOMETHING HARMFUL TO MYSELF YESTERDAY, BUT I STILL HAVE MY PARENTS TO TAKE CARE OF, SO I STOPPED THAT CRAZY THOUGHT. PLEASE, HELP ME!!! PLEASE. …— DESPERATE STUDENT
While I do appreciate your concern about the dangers of STDs, I think you may be overreacting. Even if you do contract the AIDS virus, there’s no need to injure yourself. Relax and find out as much information as you can.
The AIDS virus is infectious, but only in certain situations. The virus can be transmitted through bodily fluids, especially blood and semen. Unfortunately, it can also be transmitted by vaginal fluids, or as you called it, the “juice.” (I’ll be thinking about that tomorrow when I drink my orange juice.)
The first step is to talk to your partner. You are supposed to do this before you have sex, but since that is clearly not possible, talk to her now. Ask if she has been tested and if she has been having unprotected sex with other partners. The second step is to go to Boynton Health Service and get yourself tested for a few things. Do your best and tell your doctor everything you know so that he or she can do their best.
Please be aware that there are several other STDs that can be transmitted easily. One is the incurable HPV (genital warts). This virus varies, but people have contracted them from unprotected oral sex and wound up with warts in their throat.
You’ve learned a big lesson. Next time talk openly about sex and your sexual history before you get your kicks, and always use a condom. You can cut the tip of a condom off and slit it up the side. The resultant square is an excellent barrier for oral sex.