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The Minnesota Daily

Serving the UMN community since 1900

The Minnesota Daily

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How to know for sure if that hottie wants you

Chances are you are scoping some dreamy, hunkalicious boy right now. But hold on, sister.
Just because you slept with him and his best friend at the same time does NOT mean he likes you.
To be sure, The Cosmodailytan has found eight indisputable ways to know for sure if you and your sweetie are headed toward the altar … or if he would rather be knockin’ da boots with someone else.
1. He passes you a note asking if you want to come over and dry hump.
Boys are essentially romantics at heart. Girls often think that all guys want is sex, but be warned: The true keepers will ask for clothed, grunting romps instead.
2. He calls you 18 times a day.
He leaves phone messages with snazzy renditions of Nelson tunes.
3. He tries to get you to join his church.
What would Jesus do?.
4. He makes cookies for you and invites you over for hot chocolate.
He proves that his recipe is better than you mom’s.
5. He says really romantic things.
He say’s, “Let’s play Dungeons and Dragons!” or he asks, “Why can’t I be in the dressing room with you?”
6. He calls you at odd times to let you know he is thinking of you.
Again, he sings his favorite tunes to you from his favorite musicals.
7. He is always around.
Waiting by your car, watching you sleep, setting up cameras in every room of your house. Some cynical bastards call this stalking. But we like to call it sweet, sweet love.
8. He calls you pet names.
Snookums, doodlebug or pookie.
Muffy Lawless wants to start your fire. Muffy welcomes comments at [email protected]

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