Dr. Date: Dude in the hat; Confused!; Eugene; Bad Timing

>Dr. Date,

So there’s this girl in my class and I’ve had a little schoolboy crush on her ALL semester. I did what any guy would; I tried to get to know her a little. Part of my problem is that I’m just not awake yet at 10 a.m.

I’ve tried to get together with her outside of class so I don’t look and act like the walking zombie I am during my first class of the day everyday. In addition to me being pretty awkward when I’m tired, it turns out she’s an athlete. Unlike most guys, it doesn’t bother me that she’s three inches taller than me and way more athletic than I am.

My problem is that I want to hang out with her outside of class so I’m not so out of it and, as the semester is coming to an end, she’s on the road every weekend.

Am I stuck being the awkward classmate that she probably thinks is a creepy jersey chaser?

Dude in the hat

Dear Dude in the hat,

I might be mistaken, but I don’t think the female athletes at the University have as many “jersey chasers” as the male athletes do, seeing as they don’t have the same problems with arrogance as their male counterparts.

So, you want to hang out with her outside of class? It’ll probably be difficult to just hang out with her during the day because of different practice schedules and things like that.

But athletes (well, some of them) have to do homework, too. You have a class with her. Ask her if she wants to study with you. You could meet up at a library or a coffee shop near campus. She’ll probably understand that you have a little crush on her, but she’ll give you a chance and hang out with you.

Make sure you ask her on a day when she doesn’t have a game so you’re sure not to get rejected. Make sure the team is not going out of town. Your research will pay off.

Then, amid stacks of books at the library, you can lay on your charm and let her get a crush on you. You won’t seem like a jersey chaser then.

Dr. Date

Dear Dr. Date,

I’m currently a second-year student here at the U and just recently I met someone who has the same interests and has the most adorable smile along with the perfect sense of humor.

I know it’s a little childish of me to be writing to you but I need advice. See, the problem is I’d only see him on Mondays and Wednesdays after class and I don’t want to come off too strong about my feelings.

For a while we started talking (e-mailing), and after a few e-mails he finally asked if I had a bf, and I answered no.

But since then he’s stop replying to my e-mails, he’s supposedly never home when I call and he never says hello after class.

I don’t know what to do. Should I talk to him to see what went wrong or just let things go?

I really liked him. Help!

Confused!

Dear Confused!,

 I think it’s time to take a hint. If he really is avoiding you, he’s probably not interested. Asking him what happened will only make him LESS interested.

It might seem harsh. Sometimes we complain about how people lead us on and never give us real signs that they’re not interested – he’s giving you those signs.

If you really want to analyze what happened, think of what happened around the time he asked you if you had a boyfriend. What other conversations were you having? Did you call him too much? Were you coming on too strong?

This is not necessarily your fault, either. Something might have happened in his life to uninterest him. Maybe he doesn’t think he’s good enough. Maybe, once he realized the possibility of a real relationship was there, he freaked out.

Don’t be too hard on yourself. You never really know what happened. Just move on.

Dr. Date

Hi Dr. Date,

My name is Eugene. I live in the dorms. Up until now, I thought my roommate and I were getting along great. We would hang out a little bit and never had any disagreements.

However, this morning I woke up to find my roommate in my bed next to me. He says that he must have been sleepwalking and ended up in the wrong bed.

I have my doubts. What do you think?

Eugene

Dear Eugene,

I wouldn’t worry about it too much. Chances are your roommate is telling the truth.

You have been living together for almost an entire semester. If he didn’t try to pull anything and was just sleeping in your bed, don’t let it stress you out.

If it happens again soon, then you can start to ask questions.

Let’s face it, we all end up in a bed we weren’t expecting to wake up in once in a while . . .

Dr. Date

Dear Dr. Date,

I’m sure you get this kind of problem all the time, but here goes: Last May I broke up with my boyfriend because of indifferences and the like. Ever since then, when we saw each other we’d bicker about things that went wrong, take jabs at each other, etc.

And this happened fairly often because he’s still friends with a lot of mine.

Recently however, he came to a party at my friend’s house and things were different.

We got along well, and I realized something was definitely still there, and that it was definitely mutual.

Well, a few days after that party I lost my phone, and didn’t have my computer (long story), so I couldn’t get ahold of him.

Now he has a boyfriend. I don’t know if they started dating before or after the party – though that question nags me. To make matters worse, we had a serious conversation over break, and I realized that he still means a lot to me.

I refuse to become the jealous ex, so now I’m afraid to try to talk to him anymore.

What do you do when timing screws you?

Bad Timing

Dear Bad Timing,

Timing is everything. The problem is, we can’t try to predict how or when relationships will start or end, so worrying about timing is worthless.

I once had a huge crush on someone but couldn’t go for it because I was attached at the time. When I broke up with then-current significant other to pursue the second, the crush hooked up with someone else the next day.

Trying to mess with timing doesn’t work, so you’ll just have to wait. Try to find other crushes.

This is bad advice for a dating columnist to give, but here you go: If it’s meant to be, it’ll happen.

Dr. Date