Dear Dr. Date,Perh…

Dear Dr. Date,
Perhaps you could explain men to me. I have been separated for three-and-a-half years. The first year I cried … the second year I spent hating men … the third year I got horny. Although I get stared at by men, I don’t get asked out. I’m busy with school and don’t have the money for hanging out at night to meet guys. Out of frustration, I tried the personals. I’m not an average woman. I’m about 6 feet tall and am told I’m about an eight and a half to nine in looks. I just turned 40, but everyone says I look 30. I get a lot of guys in their 20s who want to go out with me, and they’re very good-looking guys. I also get a lot of guys three to 10 years older than me begging me for a date, but they do nothing for me. I’m really looking for an attractive guy in his mid- to late 30s. I don’t want any emotionally heavy commitment; just a friend and a lover.
My problem is when I meet someone I am attracted to — which is rare — they are just too slow. I’m talking about maybe one date every month or two. I don’t mind asking the guy out, but not every time. I don’t want to push them and scare them away, but I’m getting pretty frustrated in a horny kind of way. What’s with the really good-looking guys, anyway? It’s always the same story: They don’t date much or get much. When I go out with these guys, they say I am really nice, easy to talk with and very attractive … so what is the problem? Is there something I don’t know?
— 4th Year and Still Horny
You sound great to me, but how can one really tell what a person is like through words alone. Maybe you have some strikingly annoying fault, such as an incessant braying laugh or chewing with your mouth open. Take a look at how you behave on a date and see if there isn’t something you are doing that bombs the date. Sometimes we develop nasty habits that seem ordinary to us but might be shocking to other people. For instance, it was fairly recently that I learned I wasn’t supposed to touch my food with my hand during dinner at a restaurant. Shocking, isn’t it?
Beyond fixing a glaring fault, I think you are just going to have to keep looking for the right guy. Perhaps this column will produce a few healthy prospects. As always, if anyone is interested in going on a date with this wonderful woman, send your story to me at [email protected] I promise to make at least a halfhearted attempt to forward them to her.