Dear Dr.Date, …

Dear Dr.Date,
I have been reading your column for some time now and would like your advice on love. I have been in a long-distance relationship for 10 months. In December, my boyfriend told his best friend that he loves me but is no longer “in love” with me. I found this information out the night before I flew out to visit him. Anyway, this trip was great and we made the best of it. What puzzles me is that now he says that he is in love with me and that he only felt that the distance had separated us. For Valentine’s day he sent me 24 long-stemmed roses and a picture of him captioned, “To my rose, you’ll always be close to my heart”.
In the three years we’ve been together he has never given me anything for Valentine’s Day. Now, he has arranged for me to fly out and see him again. He calls me more often than he ever has and he told me that he thinks about me all the time. My point and question is: Does this mean he is truly falling in love with me now or do you think he did something wrong and is trying to make up for it?
This relationship has been stable and secure up until December and the fact that he is still with me says that he wants a relationship, but I am confused as to what his intentions are. In the meanwhile, I am enjoying all of this newfound attention but I don’t want to fall on my ass again.
Additional info:
-He has never cheated on anyone that I know of.
-His best friend and I are friends.
-He is lonely because he’s by himself.
-We broke up once before and both of us dated other people.
-I love him.
-I think he loves me, but because of the December comment I’m unsure.
Thanks!
— Toronto Love

Thank you for the additional information, it gives me more to work with than usual. However, I think you know that even with this information I can’t answer this question; only your boyfriend can.
Long-distance relationships can be tremendously difficult because you don’t get the hourly affirmations of love common in everyday relationships. One benefit is that you also don’t have to endure his daily annoyances like belching, snoring or shoplifting. Still, the questions prevail.
One is usually left to wonder if what they’re doing is hopeless or worthless. You’ve got to stop at that point and ask yourself just what you’re hoping for and what worth means. If you want to see if he loves you because that means you’ll marry him, I don’t think he’s ready to make that decision yet. If you just want to know someone does love you right here and now, then yes, I think he’s telling you the truth.