Re-election not a possibility; spat engulfs Ventura

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Shortly after telling his wife Terry that he would not be seeking re-election, Gov. Jesse Ventura “got in a spat” with his ego, said his spokesman John Wodele.

His ego easily overpowered the broken-spirited governor, leaving him limp on the floor of his bathroom in the governor’s mansion.

“His ego finally got the better of him,” Wodele said. “It’s like it just peeled off a pair of white gloves, smacked him about the face and said, ‘Take that, Guv-nah!'”

“It appeared his ego not only wanted him to run for re-election, but it wanted him to run under the name ‘Jesus Ventura’ instead of the usual ‘Jesse,'” Wodele said.

According to Wodele, Ventura was staggering about the bathroom swatting at his reflection in the mirror and raging about hunting man.

“Then he looked himself right in the eyes, touched his finger to his chin, gasped and dropped to the floor,” Wodele said.

Ventura’s wife said it was “about the most pathetic thing” she had ever seen.

“And I’ve been to an O-Town concert,” she said.

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