Dear Dr. Date,

I recently broke up with my ex and have been healing ever since we decided to part ways. I was doing well and really coming back to the person I want to be … until I went on TikTok. What did I see, you ask? My ex is now TikTok famous!

It’s a pretty universal thing that you want to be doing better than your ex when you both break up, but this puts a wrench in those plans. Not only does his face pop up on my ‘For You’ page, reminding me of our troubled past and the failure of our relationship, but now he’s talking about starting a Hype House with other Como creators — yes, I too am vomiting from the sound of this sentence.

I can’t find peace! Now all my friends ask me about him and his newfound fame, and all I want to do is scream.

Signed,
Going through an emotional renegade

Dear Going through an emotional renegade,

This sounds horrible. I’m sorry about the breakup and even more remorseful that he had to be TikTok famous, of all breakup outcomes. The first thing you need to do is block him from your ‘For You’ page to continue enjoying the app; the second thing you need to do is tell your friends to never bring him or his fame up again.

It’s OK to feel insecure, but I don’t know if your insecurity should stem from the fact that he’s getting thousands of views on a clock app. He hasn’t cured cancer or COVID-19. A Nobel Peace Prize won’t be arriving at his doorstep anytime soon for his rendition of the “WAP” dance. He’s simply making silly videos.

And let’s not even get into the Como Hype House. That sounds more like e-boy prison than actual enjoyment. Out of all the places I’d want to live, the last place on earth would be with a handful of purple hair, cuffed-jean, TikTok creators. But hey, that’s just me.

Don’t worry about who’s doing better. Keep focusing on yourself and enjoy the app.

Signed,
Dr. Date