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Adwan: On ‘Junioritis’

Why should college seniors have a monopoly on fatigue?
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Image by Mary Ellen Ritter

We accept the reality that is senioritis. For some students, their final year of study is marked by a sharp drop in motivation. What may have previously been a drive to succeed is swiftly replaced by a desire to just get it all over with.

However, as a junior, I reject the idea that this is something unique to seniors. I have never been more tired in my life than I am right now. Between classes, work, sleeping (only sometimes) and trying to maintain some semblance of a social life, I’m pretty drained.

Even as someone who has long been a little too enthusiastic about school, I find myself fantasizing about the finish line with increasing frequency — and I’m not the only one.

Jacob Engdahl is a junior studying classics at Gustavus Adolphus. Despite his passion for his area of study, he finds himself exhausted. One component of his fatigue, he said, is existential.

“My direction forward post-academia is vague at best,” Engdahl said.

He said he finds himself debating what path to take after undergrad. Does he go further into debt by pursuing a graduate degree? Or does he try to land a job?

Engdahl also noted that, while he once dreamed of becoming a college professor, he no longer finds it likely that his future career will be related to his major. It’s difficult for him, then, to motivate himself to do schoolwork when he knows that it’s unlikely to impact his future.

“It seems so pointless,” he said.

Sometimes, he said he even wonders if starting college was the right choice for him in the first place.

“The question of ‘why’ looms,” he said. “And the answer I can come up with now is because I’m so deep in debt it would be a terrible idea to stop.”

Ian Gullickson is a junior studying sociology of law, criminology and justice here at the University of Minnesota. He also works part-time at the RecWell climbing wall. His fatigue is related to academic burnout, he said.

“I did PSEO and I think part of it is I’ve been here so long,” Gullickson said. “I feel a little burnt out of the semester after semester grind.”

Remote learning also impacted his motivation, making him lose interest in many of his classes, he said. The return to campus then compounded this fatigue. The adjustment back to campus life — where walking, taking transit and waiting through long gaps between classes are just a part of the daily grind — was what dealt another blow to his energy levels.

Gullickson said that while he was initially overly zealous and spread himself too thin upon his return to campus life, he has since learned to dial back his commitments when he can, leaving him with “time to just be.”

He often spends this time rock climbing, playing guitar or just goofing off with his roommates.

Gullickson said his hobbies, especially rock climbing, grant him a welcome release from academic stress.

“I get a lot more joy from my job and rock climbing than from class,” he said. “In some ways, I feel like I’m majoring in rock climbing.”

As is the case with much of the academic process, we’re all moving at different paces. Seniors, if this is your first year feeling intensely burnt out, I’m here for you. Some of us may never experience this burnout at all. However, for others, myself included, senioritis may have come a year early.

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