PARKITRIGHTHERE Ne…

PARKITRIGHTHERE
Net: Some of the more common complaints we receive here at Network, the University’s emporium of angst and bitterness, involve parking. Often we take a fatalistic approach to this problem, printing few of the letters. But perhaps we’re shirking our responsibilities to facilitate social and political revolution on campus. In service of this sentiment, we offer today a Network dedicated to parking. If The Man is reading this, beware.

From The Tick: I just thought I’d let Once Upon A Something Something know that I e-mailed parking services. If we pay all of this money for a little card that tells everything about us, why can’t it be used to tell the good folks at parking services that we are, indeed, parking there for a class? It’s time for our U Cards to finally do something besides take up wallet space.

From The Brr Cold Beer: I have another issue with Parking and Transportation (lack thereof) Services.
As I neared the Campus Connector stop at Commonwealth, I noticed a bus approaching. I was about 50 yards away and didn’t want to display my sprinting skills, so I thought, ‘No big deal, I will catch the next.’ As the bus departed, I saw the next approaching bus. Now it wasn’t just me, there were three others (now all within 20 feet of the stop) and a guy sprinting across the state fairgrounds.
Did this bus stop? Noooo, it just kept right on going. Now, I don’t blame the bus driver — they are some of the friendliest people employed by this institution; I am blaming The Brass. We all know who The Brass are. Net: Yeah — they’re the servants of The Man. They are the same people who have permanent contract parking in the Washington Avenue Ramp Net: Only a 12-year waiting list! oh-so-near their cozy little winter-proof offices. This is the same Brass that raises parking rates 25 cents per day, tears down the East River Road Ramp Net: All in the name of historic preservation, charges night students $6 to park on event nights and gives alumni permission to build an eyesore on 300 parking spaces that forces me to park and ride the Campus Connector in St. Paul and instructs bus drivers to keep with their caravan at all costs.
The sad thing is that they win awards for their service.
In case you were wondering, I caught the next bus 10 minutes later. Maybe if Parking and Transportation Services really wants to help, they should modify the connector routes on subzero days to stop at Boynton for the Commonwealth patrons to get treated for frostbite. Net: Now THERE’S an idea! That should get them a Mother Teresa award for humanitarianism to add to their trophy case.

From Disgruntled Parking Attendant: Hey, Network dudes Net: Like, hey!, just thought I’d give the other side of the parking rate debate. I work as a special event parking attendant for University Parking and Transportation Services, and yes, I was one of those giving out the $6 tickets on Monday night. Sadly, those foul-mouthed, bad-tempered (otherwise known as bitchy) night school students seem to have a problem reading their extension guidebook. If they did, they would realize that they can make an oh-so-difficult trip to the continuing education office and pick up their FREE extension hang-tag that allows them to park their fuel-guzzlers in lot C-33 without paying the event rate.
Also, if they really want to complain about the parking situation, tell them to complain to both the men’s and women’s athletic departments — you know, the place the majority of the money from all those $6 tickets goes. Oh, and by the way, all, it’s going to be worse — you see, that wonderful, monumentally useless Gateway center all the regents are drooling over wiped out about 250 parking spaces. And that new hockey stadium, the one the women’s hockey team says it just HAS to have, will take even more.
Where do you think the money for all these wonderful, absolutely NECESSARY new buildings is going to come from? Net: Alumni, right? Or maybe the new Ventura administration. Hope springs eternal … Oh, and one more thing: Nobody (this means you!) parks for free, not even attendants like me, so quit whining when we don’t let you — no one is really that special.

THEPUCKSTOPSHERE
From Alkie: Hey Net — I’d just like to complain about something, and this seems to be the place to do that. Net: Whatever gave you THAT idea? I have had season hockey tickets for four years now, and I have never heard as much bullshit as I have this season. It seems some people in the student section feel the need to bitch about our own team, and specifically, certain players. OK, so maybe you don’t like certain players for whatever reason, but they are on our team, so just keep your comments to yourself. Net: Be true to your school, now. Just like you would to your girl or guy … And for the people who find it necessary to try to tell the players what to do, just shut up!
Maybe you played hockey in your high school glory days, but the University obviously didn’t come and recruit you to be on the team. Net: A great oversight — but maybe we just had too many teeth.
Finally, fair-weather fans suck!!! Do you notice that when the crowd gets into the game and shows the team some support they usually play better?!?!? I just wonder why these certain people paid more than $200 for student season tickets if they’re just going to sit there and constantly say our team and specific players “suck.” (Net, you can insert your sick comment here, if you haven’t done so already.) I know a lot of people in Section 13 would be much happier without you at the games, so next year, STAY HOME! Thanks. Net: You’re welcome. And have a nice day.