Dr. Date: Need it BAD; Slutty gal still waiting; Jaybird; A lost college student

>Dr. Date,

I’ve been dating my boyfriend for a couple years now, and everything’s great except the sex life has gotten a bit, well, stale. We used to have sex multiple times a day all over the house. Now it’s just a couple times a week, missionary only. I’ve tried convincing him to do a threesome, but he doesn’t want to. Also, I’m really into rough sex but he has NO interest in indulging me. I’m now getting crabby thinking about how lame my sex life is. How do I throw some gas on his fire?

Need it BAD

Dear Need it BAD,

To throw gas on a fire, you first need a flame.

You’re in luck, because it sounds as if you still have at least a spark if you’re gettin’ it on a few times a week.

Try surprising your boyfriend every now and then with a spontaneous sack session. It seems as if you’ve let him take over your sex life. If you’re really into one thing and he’s not into the rough-and-tumble stuff, then you need to find a common ground where you can compromise.

You obviously are not content with remaining in a missionary-style sex life. Your boyfriend is obviously controlling how you two do the deed.

He needs to be open to suggestions of how you like it, not just how he wants it.

If you continue to let him make all the decisions in bed you’re never going to be satisfied. It takes two to tango, and it takes two to make a sexual relationship work.

So, sit and talk to your guy and make him understand that you’re not really into the missionary-style sex anymore.

You should play some games to spice up your sex life. Go for a little kinky, but not rough. That way you can both be satisfied. Teach him what you like, but don’t make him conform to just your style. You two need to find a way to be equals in this relationship if it’s ever going to continue.

You had to have been satisfied at some point in the relationship, otherwise you wouldn’t still be with him. Talk to him and try to get him to take it back to where it once was.

Dr. Date

Dr. Date

So, here is the thing. I am a freshman here at the U and have yet to, shall we say, get it on. While a few people have shown interest, they have been one of many things: smelly, old, reeking of captain morgan’s and that nasty “axe” stuff, complete morons, or just UGLY. I have done my best to be promiscuous, as I hear that is what the college life is all about. It doesn’t seem to be working its charm, though. Tell me, Dr. Date, why has my sluttiness only attracted the losers?

Slutty gal still waiting

Dear Slutty gal still waiting,

Smelly? Old? Reeking of Captain Morgan? Smelling of Axe? Ugly? Stop going to frat parties!

Guess what, boys don’t want relationships with slutty girls. If you’re looking for a steady boyfriend, lose the attitude that you’re only looking for a one-night stand. Only losers look for an easy lay.

The guys you say you’re looking for are not searching for you. It’s time to cover up a little and tease the guys without flaunting every single piece of your body.

By all means, continue to go out. You’re not going to meet that someone special by staying cooped up in your house all night. Get out to the bars and the house parties. Get a girls’ night out with a bunch of your gal pals and have fun without thinking about that hookup.

When you find somebody whom you feel that instant attraction to, don’t immediately go for the sex. You sound as if you’re disappointed that you haven’t had sex yet in college. It’s fine that you haven’t.

You need to learn there is more to college than being promiscuous. When you find that guy who gives you butterflies or makes you blush, don’t try to jump him right away. Let things progress.

Dr. Date

Dear Dr. Date,

I have a gigantic problem. See the problem is that I like a girl in my class and I don’t know how to tell her that I like her.

Jaybird

Dear Jaybird,

If you’re really into this girl, you should just go for it. Be upfront with her. You don’t have to say, “I like you. Wanna jump my bones?” Just ask her out for coffee or a quick lunch after class.

If a girl is crushing on a guy and he stops by to say, “Hi, how’s it going?” she’ll see this as him going out of his way to see how she’s doing. She’ll think he’s into her because he took time out of his day to talk to her.

By you keeping silent, you’re just making her crazy. I’m sure she’s sitting at night thinking about you and why you won’t just ask her out. She’s not going to ask you out. She probably won’t even give you that many signs that she’s interested. The only way you’ll find out if she’s interested – other than asking her, of course – is if you talk to her friends, because girls gossip, and I’m sure she’s gushed about you to all her friends.

If you’re really into her, tell her. Now. If you don’t act soon, she’ll probably move on and find someone new to crush on because she’ll think you don’t like her.

Your window of opportunity is rapidly closing, hurry up and prop it back open.

Dr. Date

Dear Doctor Date,

I am writing to say that I really like this guy. Let’s call him “delicious.” I like him but I think he’s going to think I am too young for him. He is only like 2 or 3 years older than me. I really like him a lot and I think he is a wonderful guy. Another problem is I have a boyfriend and I have been with him for almost a year.

I figure I am young. So Doctor Date, how can I solve my problem?

A lost college student

Dear A lost college student,

Can I ask you a question? Why are you writing in to me? You have obviously already answered your own question.

You want to know if you should dump your boyfriend and go after this other guy who might or might not like you.

You’re already established in a relationship, but you’re questioning it. If you truly love the guy you’re with then you shouldn’t be second-guessing it.

You say you’re young and you want me to tell you that it’s all right to dump your boyfriend to chase some other guy. If that’s what you want to hear, then go for it. Dump your boyfriend, but make sure you’re doing it for the right reasons.

Have you even talked to your boyfriend about any of this? That should be your first step. Tell your current guy that you’re no longer happy in your relationship, and see if he has any suggestions on how to fix it rather than just dumping him out of the blue.

Whatever you do, make sure you talk it over with him first. And then dump him.

Dr. Date