Top ten spots on campus to get your groove-thang on

by Loose as

1. President Yudof’s office — on the desk. Aw yeah.
2. Down by the East Bank Riverflats — Yeah, being naked outside at night has its share of problems. Still, the moonlight off the river provides a romantic overture while you’re knockin’ da boots. But during the winter, better watch out for frostbite on certain unmentionables.
3. In the Washington Avenue Bridge walkway — It’ll entertain the passerbys and the vibration from the cars below will add to the multiple O’s.
4. On the roof of the Rec Center — Take the metal stairs up the back to your secret rendezvous. It’s quiet, secluded and you know you’re not the only person in the building breathing hard.
5. The basement of The Minnesota Daily — The walls are thick and the sexual tension is rampant.
6. Gibson/Nagurski football practice field after dark — There’s nothing like a little turf in your ass and being able to say you’ve done it on the 50-yard line.
7. The bushes along Northrop Mall — Often prickly, but when you need a quickie between classes, there is no better place.
8. Wilson Library’s upper floors between the book shelves — Who’s really going to need a reference book on therapeutic radiology? No one. So let’s get it on.
9. The Coffman construction site — What’s hotter than dust, construction workers and gettin’ your groove on?
10. Any number of relatively private study lounges around campus — Particularly the week of finals when everyone is stressed out and needs a study break.