Net: Welcome to November.
A THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
From Sven: Recently a Wyoming college student, Matthew Shepard, was beaten. He later died from his injuries. He was targeted only for being gay. There are at least four people in custody, with charges pending.
The father of one of the accused has only spoken in public on the condition of anonymity. He said he fears for his life because of the actions of his son. Should a parent also pay a price for his son’s terrible behavior?
The larger question is, should parents be held responsible for their adult-age college children’s behavior?
The source of these threats is not yet known. Are we to assume it’s someone from the gay community?
Does it really make any difference which side of the gay issue these threats came from?
Just how are the people making these threats any different than from the people in jail? The only difference I can see is that they haven’t acted out on their threats yet. Think about it. Net: OK. Responses?
A SECOND THOUGHT (BUT NOT REALLY)
From Pessimistic: Don’t you ever wake up in the morning and not want to be politically correct? Net: What — and let our years of brainwashing in Cultural Studies go to waste? We have a financial stage in the anti-hegemony hegemony, thank you. Think about it. We’ve all had thoughts of hate and prejudice Net: Alan Alda hasn’t, but to what extent?
A man who “had a dream” to make this world we live in a better place for his children and his children’s children. Net: John Wayne Gacy? A doctor who treated his patients with optimism, courage and equality. Net: Jack Kevorkian. A human being who stood up for who he was in a world that shot him down. Net: Lee Harvey Oswald. Prejudice? Net: We’re not sure — did we pass the quiz?
A man who was tried by the people, beaten, crowned with thorns, made to carry a cross, stripped of his clothes and hung on that cross between two thieves. Anti-Semitism? Net: Either that, or a really kinky date.
Two men who lived for a cause worth dying for; two men. Net: Inspirational. We’re touched. But we’re trying to put a point on the platitudes, and we can’t find any. Please explain, Pessimist, before our sunny day is ruined. Thank you.
THOUGHTS ABOUT DISCRIMINATION
From Angered: We need to do something about discrimination toward women in the workplace. Net: Fire them, perhaps? I know you may find it strange for me, a man Net: Note to readers — Angered possesses a phallus. Although the name is commonly considered feminine, Angered is, indeed, a man, to write about this particular issue.
But someone has to. Throughout the last couple of decades our society has worked as a whole on improving the stature of women Net: Some of them are now well over six feet tall, especially in the workplace. Well, I don’t believe we have worked hard enough.
Come on guys, you have to be with me on this one Net: Well, the secure guys are. But you know how hard it is to find a secure guy. Suppose two people with the same amount of education and job experience were interviewed for a job. Who would you pick? Hard choice, huh? Well, what if they were two people of opposite sexes? Easy choice now, right? Net: Exactly — the woman gets the job every time so the company can show off its diversity stats. It’s the glass ceiling that we’re worried about. By discriminating women in the workplace, how can we say that we are giving them a fair chance?
DANCING DENIED
From Phatty Phratty, Who’s Your Daddy: Hello distinguished, yet sassy Network! Net: Hi. I’ve always been a fan, but I’ve never dared venture into your hallowed realm until my inspiration came this week. Net: Tell the goat hello. I have two things I must bring before thee:
1. As a member of our wonderful greek community, I couldn’t help but notice during Homecoming week the record numbers of randoms (yes, not just a jock word anymore) hopelessly wandering the streets looking to enter one of our parties to destroy our houses and drink our beers. I just thought it might be nice to inform those of you attempting this to try elsewhere. New policies passed last year forbid those who haven’t already bought their friends or aren’t on our lists from getting inside our humble domains. Net: All in the spirit of openness and democracy, we assume. This was voted in to protect our houses from liabilities and damage that could take place at these events.
I, myself, consider it a warm “fuck you” after years of incessant bashing by outsiders. You slam us at every turn, yet try to invade our space to use us for your own benefit, then can’t seem to understand why we don’t like you and ask you to leave. Net: You seem to be proceeding from the false proposition that “all randoms are alike.” This isn’t true. While there is no doubt the phenomenon you describe exists, our guess is that most vocal critics of fraternities don’t try to crash the parties. It is the misdirected — the truly random randoms — who exhibit the tendencies of which you speak.
Take heed randoms! Those who resist will be beaten down by the respective membership of the houses you attempt to invade. The streets will flow with the blood of the non-believers! Net: Excellent. We’re so glad your name is on your e-mail message so we know where to trace the assault suspects. Good luck — and have a nice day.