I am honestly flattered that so many of the fringe chose to respond and take issue with my last humor article; but instead of spending this week’s column masturbating to my own genius, I thought I’d chug out something much more generic: A generic college humor column.

The opener: a paragraph that tries, at times successfully, to set up a series of jokes that either make a point or meander around until the writer runs out of the material and/or the writer’s editor cuts them off at a word limit. By this point, the reader has determined whether he or she wants to follow the author or spend his or her free time doing something more interesting. Many a writer has screwed this up, including the present one (how am I faring so far?).

The body: Here, the author tries to make joke, after joke, after joke (trying not to force too many), after joke. Sometimes, the jokes rise and crescendo in the conclusion, but that depends on the style of the article and the skills of the writer. The reader’s interest is like a locomotive: you need to continuously throw coal in the engine to keep it going (and hope it doesn’t crash).

That’s not to say every good humor column should make you erupt in side-splitting laughter. Occasionally, a column doesn’t dive for the funny bone, but instead goes through your brain: like an article playing on the concept of a generic humor column.

Conclusion: This is a common weak spot for many humor columns, because, unlike our more “serious” (and often less erudite) colleagues in politics, the humor peddler often isn’t aiming to make a particular point other than amusing you.

I’m sure some of you found this article amusing, while others are furrowing your brows in a vain attempt to understand why I’m labeled a “humor” columnist. All I care about is my salary.

All the best,

Humor Columnist #106

P.S.: A special thank you to students, since your student activity fees are what’s paying me! You’re indirectly funding Chino Latino, where I plan to drink it all away.

Bobak Ha’Eri welcomes comments at [email protected].