Dr. Date: My “sophomore” boyfriend has been lying to me — what now?

I tried to send something to his University email only to get a “this account is not active” response…


by Dr. Date

Dear Dr. Date, 

My boyfriend and I met in a senior level class as sophomores last fall and bonded over feeling out of place — while everyone was looking for jobs after graduation, we were nervous over planning for next year’s classes. After being assigned as group partners for the year, we ended up making out instead of making the Google slides and the rest is history. We’re already planning on moving in together as soon as we graduate, but until then, we see each other between classes pretty often.

Well, I thought it was “between classes” for both of us. But when I tried to send something to my boyfriend’s University email only to get a “this account is not active” response, I asked him what was up. He finally confessed to me that he was actually a senior in that sophomore class last year and was just trying to relate to me — he actually graduated this spring! Apparently, he was going to pretend to be at campus while actually working a full-time job, and was going to tell me in two years when “we” graduated. 

I would have loved him just as much if he told me he was a senior in the first place, but now he’s broken my trust. I’m amazed and horrified by him — I have no clue what to do here. Help!


The Secret Graduate 

Dear The Secret Graduate,

Well, at least you found out now? Imagine dating a college student for three years and finding out they’ve secretly been working at “Insert Company Here” this whole time…

But seriously, this SCREAMS red flag. Yeah, the lie may have been cute if he revealed it within the first week — I might “awwww” if some bashful guy I was into told me he just wanted to get closer to me. Keeping up the lie for months (and planning on doing it for years) is downright sociopathic. If I were you, I’d ditch and find someone who is honest about major life issues, not a guy who would make up a fake life to keep dating someone.


Dr. Date