OMG it’s Friday. And because Rebecca wrote the rules – it’s her world, we’re all just livin’ in it – it’s imperative that we’ve gotta get down on Friday. There’s no better way to get down than to yuk it up with your boos and buddies at karaoke.

After four one or two drinks, that liquid courage sets fire to your loins and subsequently allows you to pretend you’re Adele or Aerosmith in front a chummy crowd of strangers – delightful! The first time you pop that karaoke cherry can be scary. You may feel pressure and nervous about the consequences. Questions will arise. Does it hurt? Will the whole school find out? Am I going to feel weird afterwards? Has that girl done it, too?

Let me help you. I know it’s cold out there you guys, so stick somewhere close. Northeast is a karaoke landfill. It’s overflowing with bars and mics and people who want to be just like you. Try one of these dives:

Otter Saloon

617 Central Ave. SE

Minneapolis, MN 55414

Vegas Lounge

965 Central Ave. NE

Minneapolis, MN 55413

The 1029 Bar

1029 Marshall St. NE

Minneapolis, MN 55413

Next is figuring out whom you’re going to do it with. Your first time has got to be with someone you’re comfortable with; someone in your range. Are you more of an alto like Amy? Or do you hit the high notes like Mariah? Do you like spittin’ to Dre or Mr. West? Choose wisely. I’ve selected a few crowd favorites for you to pick from so you aren’t booed all the way back to Bloco with your shoddy choice.

Amy Winehouse, “Valerie”

Natalie Imbruglia, “Torn”

Journey, “Don’t Stop Believin’”

Eminem, “Lose Yourself”

Frank Sinatra, “Fly Me To The Moon”

Blackstreet, “I Like The Way You Work”

Madonna, “Like A Prayer”

Jewel, “Who Will Save Your Soul”

Usher, “Burn”

Justin Timberlake, “Rock Your Body”

No Doubt, “Don’t Speak”

Be safe and use protection. God bless.