Dr. Date: I love Christmas, but my girlfriend doesn’t get it

Can she judge me on how I spend my own money?

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Dr. Date

Dear Dr. Date,

The holiday season is fast approaching, and I couldn’t be more excited. I’m the kind of person who goes all out for every holiday, but all holidays pale in comparison to the event of the year — Christmas. I start planning my annual holiday party in October and have been buying decorations since December 26 of last year. 

Now that it’s socially acceptable to start feeling excited, I’ve been buying things for the holiday. I save up all year for presents, food and a real Christmas tree, so it doesn’t really eat into my budget. However, every time I come home with something new, my girlfriend rolls her eyes. She’s been becoming more and more angry every time I show her a present I bought for a close friend. Every day I hear a new comment about how I should spend my money on better things.

Better things, apparently, mean a gift for her. She sent me a text last week saying she thinks I’ve been spending too much money and won’t have any left for the stuff she wants! I then received a 30-item-long list and another link to an Amazon wish list, all with gifts ranging from $30-$300 dollars. She told me she expects at least ten presents, one every day leading up to Christmas. When I told her how ridiculous that was, she told me that I should have added it into my “present budget” and will need to skip the Christmas tree this year. 

We both like celebrating, but apparently she likes receiving more than giving. How can I tell her this might be a dealbreaker?

Sincerely,

College Santa

Dear College Santa,

There’s so much in here I don’t even know where to begin. She’s trying to tell you how to spend your money, and unless you’re spending hundreds on in-app purchases or illegal substances, that isn’t really her call. If you made it, you can spend it, no matter how silly another person may consider the items. Rather than tell you her problems at first, she mocks your love for a holiday, which is just unnecessary. Finally, she tries to insist you have to show your worth monetarily. Hasn’t she ever heard it’s the thought that counts?

I don’t know the whole story of your relationship, but these seems like red flags (or red Christmas lights?) This isn’t just about your love for Christmas — she seems controlling, and if you don’t address this soon, you might be selling off your advent calendars. It may be awkward explaining to the family at Christmas dinner why your girlfriend isn’t there, but hey, it’s cuffing season. Just head to the Christmas section of Target and scout out enthusiastic girls there instead. 

Sincerely,

Dr. Date