The Minnesota Daily

All content by Palmer Haasch

Haasch: Get yourself a group chat

May 6, 2019

I’m in this group chat. There are 15 of us: all young, female journalists working (or in my case, very much hoping to work) in digital media covering beats ranging from technology policy to fandom to...

Haasch: The hellish Avengers news cycle is refreshing

April 29, 2019

As of writing this column, I still haven’t seen “Avengers: Endgame.” Even amid a busy weekend full of things like Spring Jam, looming deadlines and family visits, it’s all I can think about. I...

Haasch: How has ‘Avengers: Endgame’ earned the right to be three whole hours long?

April 22, 2019

Marvel’s “Avengers: Endgame” is one of the few movies that I’m willing to sit in a movie theater to watch for three straight hours. The film, which premieres this Friday, is arguably the most anticipated...

Haasch: What’s the significance of a ‘problematic’ celebrity?

April 15, 2019

Last Friday, Korean pop septet BTS released their new album Map of the Soul: Persona as well as a music video for its title track, “Boy With Luv feat. Halsey.” The collaboration was well received —...

Haasch: Defending fan fiction is the hill I’m willing to die on

April 8, 2019

I read, frankly, a ridiculous amount of fan fiction on a daily basis. In fact, I read so much fan fiction that I decided to write my thesis on it. I've spent the past six months researching how fan fiction...

Haasch: PETA’s cow milk tweet proves that being horny on main works

April 1, 2019

Last week, PETA tweeted an image that at first blow looks a whole lot like erotic furry art. The image, which depicts a full-grown man drinking from the very human breast of a disconcertingly anthropomorphic...

Haasch: Internet humor has become means of coping with an overwhelming news cycle

March 25, 2019

Last Friday, now-household American name and special counsel Robert Mueller turned in his report on possible Russian interference during the 2016 election to Attorney General William Barr. The report is...

Haasch: Please, for the love, learn some transit etiquette

March 11, 2019

Public transit is a beautiful but sometimes soul-sucking modern marvel. In the recent winter months (and in times past), University of Minnesota students have been plagued by inadequate buses, delays in...

Haasch: Momo challenge hoax raises questions about digital literacy

March 4, 2019

Sometimes adults do stupid things on the internet. (Disclaimer: at one time or another, everyone does something stupid on the internet.) However, concerned parents and media organizations are responsible...

Haasch: “Hi, I’m a reporter for the Minnesota Daily … ” is a meme that could only come from r/uofmn

February 25, 2019

The University of Minnesota subreddit, r/uofmn, is a thriving online student community that is the best place for UMN memes. This includes the recent, “Hi, I’m a reporter with a Minnesota Daily …”...

Haasch: If a queer character dies, is it ‘bury your gays?’

February 18, 2019

Cartoon fandom is a tumultuous place. Centralized on primarily Tumblr and Twitter, fans of series both new and old share fan art, fanfiction and comments about cartoon series. While fandom has long been...

Haasch: BuzzFeed’s Community is gross exploitation of content creators

February 11, 2019

Two weeks ago, BuzzFeed laid off approximately 15 percent of its staff in what was a devastating blow to digital media. The cuts, compounded with others at companies like Verizon Media, Grindr and Vice,...

Haasch: Zoinks! Powerful Shaggy is the best meme of 2019 so far

February 4, 2019

This past week, a significant number of netizens tacitly agreed that Shaggy from Scooby-Doo was the single most powerful being in the universe. This was something that I was willing to take at face value....

Haasch: This week’s devastating layoffs spell concern for those in digital media

January 28, 2019

The past week in digital media has been devastating, and it’s not over yet. BuzzFeed is in the midst of a 15 percent staff layoff. After a round of layoffs last Friday, BuzzFeed’s national security...

Haasch: We all love reliving our personal ‘cringe’

January 21, 2019

In the past week, the #2009vs2019 (or alternatively, #HowHardDidAgeHitYou) challenge has been inescapable on all major social media platforms. My timeline has been full of 10-year-old pictures of my friends,...

Haasch: The best memes of 2018, month by month

December 10, 2018

2018 has been an incredible year for memes and a nostalgic pop culture resurgence. Here are my picks for the best of the year, month by month. January: #BlackHogwarts  This was a hashtag where Twitter...

Haasch: They did surgery on a grape’s meme success lies in repetition

December 3, 2018

They did surgery on a grape. If you’re not familiar with Twitter’s top meme of the week, allow me to paint you a picture. Imagine a photo of a grape with it’s skin delicately peeled back and tiny...

Haasch: Male entitlement is out, female empowerment is in

November 26, 2018

"She-Ra and the Princesses of Power" is one of the best cartoons of 2018. A reboot of the original 1985 series, the new "She-Ra" (headed up by "Nimona" creator Noelle Stevenson) updates the show’s familiar...

Haasch: LA to the left, NYC to the right. Here I am.

November 19, 2018

I have lived in a lot of places. In the past year and a half, I’ve spent no more than four consecutive months in one location, and as a result, there’s a small set of cities to which I feel personally...

Haasch: Millennial pandering works, so long as it’s authentic

November 12, 2018

On Nov. 1, the official Burger King account tweeted the following exchange: “him: it’s only a month / waifu: ………..” followed by the sobbing emoji. I had to reread the tweet a few times before...

Haasch: Turning to TikTok for memes is an inevitability

November 5, 2018

For the past week, I’ve had one particular rap verse stuck in my head. Even saying that I’ve been thinking about the entire verse is generous. In actuality, only the line, “Hit or miss / I guess...

Haasch: Despite attacks on their civil rights, transgender and intersex people still exist

October 29, 2018

Last week, The New York Times broke news of a memo from the Department of Health and Human Services. In the memo, the department argued in favor of a unilateral definition of gender determined “on a...

Haasch: I rode exclusively electric scooters for a week. Here’s what I learned

October 22, 2018

This past week, I undertook what was probably the most ridiculous project of my burgeoning journalism career. After having my interest piqued by the Lime and Bird scooters littered across campus, I rode...

Haasch: Transphobia on painted bridge panel mocks real social issues

October 15, 2018

The University of Minnesota College Republican’s bridge panel was vandalized this past Friday night or Saturday morning for the third year in a row. As a seasoned paint the bridge veteran and senior...

Haasch: Loving yourself, no matter how simple it seems, is a constant process

October 8, 2018

Last Wednesday, I stood in a packed arena, my skin becoming sticky with sweat as I yelled my voice hoarse. My roommate, a friend and I had driven six hours that day from Minneapolis to catch BTS, the biggest...

Haasch: “Areas one and three” is the local creepypasta we deserve

October 1, 2018

Unspeakable horrors have occurred in Keller Hall “areas one and three,” or so suggests Reddit user u/SouthTop, who posted the following on the University of Minnesota subredddit nearly two weeks ago: “Both...

Haasch: Film, literature, anime bros — please, god, stop

September 24, 2018

Last summer, I attended an advanced screening of “The Darkest Minds,” a young adult, dystopian flick starring Amandla Stenberg, along with a slew of other actors and actresses. The movie itself was...

Haasch: Cartoons are great and merit your indulgence

September 17, 2018

Last Friday, I stayed up until 6 a.m. to be one of the first to watch the first nine episodes of "The Dragon Prince," a new Netflix original cartoon. This is about as on-brand as it gets for me. I’ve...

Haasch: Without establishing an effective work/life balance, something will break

September 10, 2018

I am the kind of person who wants to do every single thing while simultaneously being everything to everyone.  This mindset has lead to a great deal of success for me in some ways. For example, consistently...

Haasch: We have no choice but to embrace surreal internet humor

September 3, 2018

Last week, my Twitter feed was a hellscape of animations of the horrifying, banal nursery rhyme, "Johny Johny Yes Papa." The song — and its seemingly endless set of iterations — follows Johny, a sneaky...

Haasch: Crossing fandom borders merits excitement, not “Panic!”

August 1, 2018

A week ago, I made the impulse decision to buy a ticket to the Panic! at the Disco concert at Madison Square Garden. Like many queer women, I’m a huge Hayley Kiyoko fan. She was one of the openers, and...

Haasch: 21 years old is an incredibly arbitrary drinking age

July 25, 2018

Today is my birthday. I’m not a big birthday person. Typically, I default to 'coy, but appreciative' every time someone acknowledges it. Plus, I have a summer birthday. I love celebrating with family...

Haasch: Don’t feel guilty, social media exhaustion happens to everyone

July 18, 2018

I’ve poured entirely too much energy into Twitter in the five years since I joined. As someone looking to cover internet culture and fandom spaces, I like to think that being perpetually active on Twitter...

Haasch: How to live with others

July 11, 2018

I met my freshman roommate over Facebook. It was May 2015, just before we graduated from high school. We connected after I posted in the class of 2019 Facebook group. It was the first time I had ever been...

Haasch: We need more of Terry Crews’ masculinity

July 3, 2018

Terry Crews wears many hats; actor, Old Spice guy, former NFL player and father are just a few of them. The "Brooklyn Nine-Nine" star is also an open survivor of sexual assault and a vocal advocate. Spurred...

Haasch: South Korean boy band BTS’ commercial success represents new breakthrough

June 27, 2018

The 2018 Billboard Music Awards featured star-studded performances ranging from Shawn Mendes to Demi Lovato. I’m not usually one to pay attention to music shows. I tend to trust the important moments...

Haasch: Internet toxicity should not be a given

June 20, 2018

Last week, "Stranger Things" actress Millie Bobby Brown became the latest name in a string of pop culture figures who left social media after sustaining harassment. This was preceded most recently by actress...

Haasch: It takes strides to settle into a new place

June 13, 2018

I hate moving. I’m an awful packer. I feel like it takes me weeks to organize a new living space, and I’m perpetually aware of the distance between me and my family and friends every time I relocate....

Haasch: We need to talk about intersex inclusion

December 11, 2017

The LGBTQ community encapsulates a wide variety of identities that fall outside normative understandings of gender, sex and sexuality. Some of these identities are more represented than others in literature,...

Haasch: Fan content should support, not harm, idols

December 4, 2017

Fandom has been a crucial part of my life ever since I was 12 years old. I discovered fan fiction in middle school, and was quickly exposed to a community of fans, writers and artists that was incredibly...

Haasch: Don’t remain neutral about net neutrality

November 27, 2017

A week ago, the Federal Communications Commission revealed their intent to break down regulations that protect equal internet access. This concept, better known as “net neutrality,” is crucial in ensuring...

Haasch: Start using gender-neutral language

November 20, 2017

Recently, I spent a weekend among the queerest group of people that I’ve ever had the privilege to be around — and by queer I don’t mean dictionary definition number one or two (“strange, odd,...

Haasch: Stop talking around female sexuality

November 13, 2017

A week ago, I went to see the University of Minnesota Theatre Arts & Dance department’s production of In the Next Room, or The Vibrator Play. The show certainly lived up to it’s name: I can confirm...

Haasch: Makeup shouldn’t feel necessary

November 6, 2017

I went to get a haircut the other day, which is nothing out of the ordinary. I have short hair, which means frequent haircuts. As I quickly put myself together before leaving my appointment, I struggled...

Haasch: Stop comparing yourself to others

October 31, 2017

In an age where information about our peers’ lives is at our fingertips, it’s easier than ever to compare our lives to those of others. My social feeds are a constant stream of my friends’ accomplishments,...

Haasch: The emotional labor inherent in “Me Too”

October 23, 2017

A week ago, actress Alyssa Milano urged women who had been sexually harassed or assaulted to simply tweet two words: “Me Too.” In the aftermath of dozens of sexual assault allegations involving Hollywood...

Haasch: New gender-neutral emojis are small, but crucial representation

October 16, 2017

Last Monday, Apple released iOS update 11.1. Typically, I don’t pay attention to iOS updates — my phone is too full of photos, apps and music to even think about downloading them. However, this update...

Haasch: National Coming Out Day should be no pressure for queer individuals

October 9, 2017

Approximately a year ago, I anxiously scrolled through the myriad of coming out posts on social media from people I knew. I wrestled with the decision of whether or not to write my own the entire day....

Haasch: K-pop’s growing international popularity

October 2, 2017

Last March, I found myself speeding down I-94 toward Chicago with my roommate on a Wednesday afternoon. After finishing a midterm at 1:30 p.m., we bolted out of the city as soon as possible. Five days...

Haasch: Leisure reading provides stress relief from taxing class readings

September 25, 2017

As a child, I typically read around two books per week. These varied from children’s novels like "Junie B. Jones" to young adult series like "Artemis Fowl" or "Maximum Ride". From a young age, my parents...