Chances are, we’ve all been in a situation where a friend or family member gave their take on a social or political issue that we didn’t agree with, and it made us take a step back. While our first instinct may be to flee or deflect, we need to stop trying to keep the peace.

In talking to my Generation Z peers, a common denominator always seems to be a distaste for confrontation and a need to be liked by everyone, even if it’s someone they fundamentally disagree with.

This fear of ostracization from those who disagree, or even from friends who want us to stay silent, encourages a bad habit of not speaking our minds even when we know we should. 

University of Minnesota sociology professor Claire Kamp Dush said Gen Z might be afraid of losing connections with friends in a world where it’s already hard to make them. She said it can help to talk to people individually and explain why what they said made you uncomfortable, and we can try approaching someone with the idea of  “How would I want to be told that?”

Kamp Dush said a potential source of misinformation for people could be the kind of content they’re encountering on social media, which can play a large role in their opinions.

“I think it’s hard today given that people are in such echo chambers,” Kamp Dush said.

Gen Z’s connection to social media has been a powerful tool for change, but it’s also led to a dangerous rise in conservatism and a fall into alt-right thinking. 

Although in the moment it seems challenging to confront someone we know, it’s actually one of the most significant things we can do to stand with our communities against intolerance and push back against hateful right-wing narratives.

At a time when our state is facing historic levels of violence against marginalized communities, staying silent always has a cost. Studies show exposure to racial and ethnic discrimination correlates with higher positive screening for mental health problems.

University philosophy assistant professor Dwight K. Lewis Jr. said when we stay silent, we’re setting a precedent for the discrimination that is inflicted upon marginalized groups.  

“When we don’t stand up, we become another checkmark in allowing people to give harm,” Lewis said.

For a lot of Americans, existence is political. Many people don’t have the luxury of ignoring the news or turning their heads away when it comes to conversations about race, gender and class because the views and decisions of those in power directly influence their everyday freedoms.

Lewis said how you address situations with the people you’re close to has wide-reaching impacts.

“The reason why you’re not silent is because you have a demanding love towards a community, and you’re also trying to implore your smaller community, your family, your friends, to be loving towards the larger community,” Lewis said. “It’s really about not giving the permission to make people feel unsafe and alienated and protecting those people’s dignity.”

Lewis spoke about a class assignment in which he has students read James Baldwin’s “A Letter to My Nephew.” He asks students to choose someone in their lives that they want to write to, whether it’s a younger version of themselves or someone close to them. The letter is meant to convey what it’s like for the student to move through the world based on their class, race, gender or other positions in society.

“We want to demand them to love others more instead of harming others more,” Lewis said. “Speaking is an act of courage.”

A hallmark of Minnesotan social cues has always been our passive-aggressive demeanor. In some scenarios, it’s just easier to put on a cheerful front even when you don’t feel like it.  

However, our democracy depends on our ability to tell those closest to us when they sound ignorant. We must understand the significance of using our voices to call out prejudice among our peers and family.